He couldn't have written it clearer and more accurate than this!
Truth and justice are no longer Malaysian way
By Michael Backman
The Age
November 21, 2007
THE Government of Australia will probably change hands this weekend. There will be no arrests, no tear gas and no water cannons. The Government of John Howard will leave office, the Opposition will form a government and everyone will accept the verdict.
For this, every Australian can feel justifiably proud. This playing by the rules is what has made Australia rich and a good place in which to invest. It is a country to which people want to migrate; not leave.
Now consider Malaysia. The weekend before last, up to 40,000 Malaysians took to the streets in Kuala Lumpur to protest peacefully against the judiciary's lack of independence, electoral fraud, corruption and a controlled media.
In response, they were threatened by the Prime Minister, called monkeys by his powerful son-in-law, and blasted with water cannons and tear gas. And yet the vast majority of Malaysians do not want a change of government. All they want is for their government to govern better.
Both Malaysia and Australia have a rule of law that's based on the English system. Both started out as colonies of Britain. So why is Malaysia getting it so wrong now?
Malaysia's Government hates feedback. Dissent is regarded as dangerous, rather than a product of diversity. And like the wicked witch so ugly that she can't stand mirrors, the Government of Prime Minister Abdullah Badawi controls the media so that it doesn't have to see its own reflection.
Demonstrations are typically banned. But what every Malaysian should know is that in Britain, Australia and other modern countries, when people wish to demonstrate, the police typically clear the way and make sure no one gets hurt. The streets belong to the people. And the police, like the politicians, are their servants. It is not the other way around.
But increasingly in Malaysia, Malaysians are being denied a voice — especially young people.
Section 15 of Malaysia's Universities and University Colleges Act states that no student shall be a member of or in any manner associate with any society, political party, trade union or any other organisation, body or group of people whatsoever, be it in or outside Malaysia, unless it is approved in advance and in writing by the vice-chancellor.
Nor can any student express or do anything that may be construed as expressing support, sympathy or opposition to any political party or union. Breaking this law can lead to a fine, a jail term or both.
The judiciary as a source of independent viewpoints has been squashed. The previous prime minister, Mahathir Mohamad, did many good things for Malaysia, but his firing of the Lord President (chief justice) and two other Supreme Court judges in 1988 was an unmitigated disaster. Since then, what passes for a judiciary in Malaysia has been an utter disgrace and the Government knows it.
Several years ago, Daim Zainuddin, the country's then powerful finance minister, told me that judges in Malaysia were a bunch of idiots. Of course we want them to be biased, he told me, but not that biased.
Rarely do government ministers need to telephone a judge and demand this or that verdict because the judges are so in tune with the Government's desires that they automatically do the Government's beckoning.
Just how appalling Malaysia's judiciary has become was made clear in recent weeks with the circulation of a video clip showing a senior lawyer assuring someone by telephone that he will lobby the Government to have him made Lord President of the Supreme Court because he had been loyal to the Government. That someone is believed to have been Ahmad Fairuz Abdul Halim, who did in fact become Lord President.
A protest march organised by the Malaysian Bar Council was staged in response to this, and corruption among the judiciary in general. But the mainstream Malaysian media barely covered the march even though up to 2000 Bar Council members were taking part. Reportedly, the Prime Minister's office instructed editors to play down the event.
Instead of a free media, independent judges and open public debate, Malaysians are given stunts — the world's tallest building and most recently, a Malaysian cosmonaut. Essentially, they are given the play things of modernity but not modernity itself.
Many senior Malays are absolutely despairing at the direction of their country today. But with the media tightly controlled they have no way of getting their views out to their fellow countrymen. This means that most Malaysians falsely assume that the Malay elite is unified when it comes to the country's direction.
Tengku Razaleigh Hamzah, a former finance minister and today still a member of the Government, told me several weeks ago in Kuala Lumpur that he could see no reason why today Malaysia could not have a completely free media, a completely independent judiciary and that corrupt ministers and other officials should be publicly exposed and humiliated.
According to Tengku Razaleigh, all of the institutions designed to make Malaysia's Government accountable and honest have been dismantled or neutered.
It didn't need to be like this. Malaysia is not North Korea or Indonesia. It is something quite different. Its legal system is based on British codes. Coupled with traditional Malay culture, which is one of the world's most hospitable, decent and gentle cultures, Malaysia has the cultural and historical underpinnings to become one of Asia's most civilised, rules-based, successful societies.
Instead, Malaysia's Government is incrementally wasting Malaysia's inheritance.
Friday
Thursday
Dogland Part II - A Mangie goes to the Capes
Dogland was all abuzz with excitement with a recent development and plans for dogs to venture into places unknown.
The Mangies have decided to make Dogland seemed ultra-cool and more advanced by working with KanineCentral to send one dog from Dogland to the Capes together with a Kanine. Now, very few dogs have ever been to the Capes except for some Kanines and a Retriever or two from another kennel so the Mangies are intent on using this ruse to boost their image as 'great' pack leaders.
They launched a complete marketing strategy to cover the rising growls of dissent and announced the many great deeds the chosen dog will perform while at the Capes which will benefit the whole of Dogland. They even went so far as to hire a Retriever from lands far away, who had been to the Capes several times, to go all over the land and promote this grand 'Journey to the Capes' scheme. They cleverly played down the actual amount of bones and meat needed to send the Mangie to the Capes.
Soon, many dogs in the land ignorantly caught on to the wave of excitement while Capes lovers applaud and welcomed the project. However, the growls of dissent were not easily silenced. Many other dogs felt it is a total waste of bones and meat which could be put to better use for the old, the disabled and those too weak to scrounge for their own meals. They tried to tell the other dogs but were mostly ignored.
Thus the 'selection' process for the fittest dog in Dogland to represent the kennel in the great journey to the Capes. It was a painstaking, tedious process with hundreds of dogs rushing to apply and achieve the fame of being the first dog in Dogland to ever go to the Capes. To avoid suspicions, the weeks leading up to the actual selection saw a Labrador, a Saint Bernard and a Hound amongst the top ten finalists of mostly Mangies.
Needless to say, despite repeatedly proclaiming that the selection process is based on the fitness of the dog and not the breed, a Mangie was chosen amongst many other non-Mangies. The second in line to go is also a Mangie. These two Mangies were sent to KanineCentral for dog training so that they would be able to survive the arduous trip to the Capes. The marketing campaign continues as more dogs began to believe that sending a Mangie to the Capes will actually solve all problems in Dogland.
The Mangies themselves thought the whole scheme is an absolute success to get the dogs' support. 'Ah, soon, there would not be any growling dog in the whole of Dogland because we have sent a dog to the Capes!' they secretly thought.
Little did the dogs know that the Mangie selected for the journey will get a free trip fully sponsored by Dogland and will not accomplish anything while there. The Mangie was just a dog with no special capabilities like the Kanine and were treated as a 'guest' in the journey rather than an important part of the exploring team.
The Mangie went to the Capes with much yapping and howls. The great journey was so broadly advertised that every dog and pup in Dogland knew about it, although not all necessarily agree to it.
Also with much yapping and howls, the Mangie came back and promptly announced how successful the whole journey had been. The Mangie even claimed to have discovered important sniffing measures while at the Capes.
Time passed and the whole Journey to the Capes spectacle faded away. The Mangie did not bring any riches to Dogland. There were no sudden windfall of bones or meat. In fact, after the hype died down, there was no physical benefit to be seen from the whole project.
The bones and meat are all gone, paid to the KanineCentral to ferry a Mangie to the Capes as a 'guest'. Meanwhile, many dogs in Dogland continue to suffer due to bad infrastructure, poor health and worsening living conditions in the land. In all the hype of sending a Mangie to the Capes, the very important issue of caring for all the dogs in Dogland was forgotten and pushed aside.
It was as if it is more important to waste millions of bones and meat to send a Mangie to the Capes than to use it for the good of all of the dogs in Dogland.
The Mangies have decided to make Dogland seemed ultra-cool and more advanced by working with KanineCentral to send one dog from Dogland to the Capes together with a Kanine. Now, very few dogs have ever been to the Capes except for some Kanines and a Retriever or two from another kennel so the Mangies are intent on using this ruse to boost their image as 'great' pack leaders.
They launched a complete marketing strategy to cover the rising growls of dissent and announced the many great deeds the chosen dog will perform while at the Capes which will benefit the whole of Dogland. They even went so far as to hire a Retriever from lands far away, who had been to the Capes several times, to go all over the land and promote this grand 'Journey to the Capes' scheme. They cleverly played down the actual amount of bones and meat needed to send the Mangie to the Capes.
Soon, many dogs in the land ignorantly caught on to the wave of excitement while Capes lovers applaud and welcomed the project. However, the growls of dissent were not easily silenced. Many other dogs felt it is a total waste of bones and meat which could be put to better use for the old, the disabled and those too weak to scrounge for their own meals. They tried to tell the other dogs but were mostly ignored.
Thus the 'selection' process for the fittest dog in Dogland to represent the kennel in the great journey to the Capes. It was a painstaking, tedious process with hundreds of dogs rushing to apply and achieve the fame of being the first dog in Dogland to ever go to the Capes. To avoid suspicions, the weeks leading up to the actual selection saw a Labrador, a Saint Bernard and a Hound amongst the top ten finalists of mostly Mangies.
Needless to say, despite repeatedly proclaiming that the selection process is based on the fitness of the dog and not the breed, a Mangie was chosen amongst many other non-Mangies. The second in line to go is also a Mangie. These two Mangies were sent to KanineCentral for dog training so that they would be able to survive the arduous trip to the Capes. The marketing campaign continues as more dogs began to believe that sending a Mangie to the Capes will actually solve all problems in Dogland.
The Mangies themselves thought the whole scheme is an absolute success to get the dogs' support. 'Ah, soon, there would not be any growling dog in the whole of Dogland because we have sent a dog to the Capes!' they secretly thought.
Little did the dogs know that the Mangie selected for the journey will get a free trip fully sponsored by Dogland and will not accomplish anything while there. The Mangie was just a dog with no special capabilities like the Kanine and were treated as a 'guest' in the journey rather than an important part of the exploring team.
The Mangie went to the Capes with much yapping and howls. The great journey was so broadly advertised that every dog and pup in Dogland knew about it, although not all necessarily agree to it.
Also with much yapping and howls, the Mangie came back and promptly announced how successful the whole journey had been. The Mangie even claimed to have discovered important sniffing measures while at the Capes.
Time passed and the whole Journey to the Capes spectacle faded away. The Mangie did not bring any riches to Dogland. There were no sudden windfall of bones or meat. In fact, after the hype died down, there was no physical benefit to be seen from the whole project.
The bones and meat are all gone, paid to the KanineCentral to ferry a Mangie to the Capes as a 'guest'. Meanwhile, many dogs in Dogland continue to suffer due to bad infrastructure, poor health and worsening living conditions in the land. In all the hype of sending a Mangie to the Capes, the very important issue of caring for all the dogs in Dogland was forgotten and pushed aside.
It was as if it is more important to waste millions of bones and meat to send a Mangie to the Capes than to use it for the good of all of the dogs in Dogland.
The story of Dogland
In Doggyland resides many different breeds of dogs from German Shepherds to Bulldogs to ChiHuaHuas to Poodles and gentle giants, Saint Bernards. There are also a lot of mixed breeds but mostly it is populated with a lot of the Mangies breed who leads Dogland.
As the pack leaders, the Mangies took advantage of the other breeds. During earlier days, the other breeds did not notice, they just went about digging up bones for themselves and mainly ignoring whatever the Mangies said or do.
That is until recent times when the other breeds suddenly realised that they had been had!
The Mangies have been stealing their bones from right under their noses in broad daylight. To make matters worse, the Mangies are even bullying other weaker Mangies to show their own power.
As time passes and population in Dogland grows, the Mangies started boasting about their so-called victories in their forays into various unknown territories using their stolen resources.
Now, the other breeds are becoming disgruntled. Many are growling and baring their teeth at the Mangies behind their backs.
However, few are brave enough to actually face up to the Mangies. Those who actually did were dragged by their scruffs to be locked in the pound and ultimately silenced.
Many dogs have given up and are even moving on to other greener pastures where pack leaders do not openly and officially discriminate against different breeds and all breeds are treated fairly. The less able ones could not do anything but stay on and hoped for a change in pack leaders.
In the meantime, things become worse. The Mangies became fat and lazy and had taken to ordering all the other breeds to do their work for them. Whoever dared to refuse the Mangies were immediately taken to the dog pound.
A clever group of Beagles then started exposing the cruel and corrupted practices of the Mangies for all to see. This did not bode well for the Mangies. Angered by the hard-hitting facts being presented for all to see, the Mangies started a conspiracy plan for the downfall of the Beagles. This includes smearing their reputation, dragging some of them to the dog pound and launching all sorts of attack plans to silence the Beagles.
However, instead of being frightened into silence, the Beagles continued to be even more aggressively. Realising that the ripples of dissatisfaction are growing into huge waves, the Mangies launched into a different game plan instead.
They started throwing out tiny bits of bacons to satisfy the disgruntled dogs. They promised big pieces of steaks and choice cuts and bigger bones. They pretended to drag a few errant Mangies into the pound to prove that the Mangies are really good leaders but had the misfortune to be plagued with a few rogue Mangies.
The dogs, being loyal Doglanders, believed the Mangies. They thought the Mangies would not lie to them. The Beagles were not easily fooled but found that the other dogs have been easily won over by cheap promises.
A not so peaceful quiet settled on Dogland as the Mangies continue to lie and trick the other dogs into letting them continue as pack leaders while the Beagles rack their brains for a way to finally expose the Mangies for who they really are.
Stay tune for Part Two of the Dogland stories....
As the pack leaders, the Mangies took advantage of the other breeds. During earlier days, the other breeds did not notice, they just went about digging up bones for themselves and mainly ignoring whatever the Mangies said or do.
That is until recent times when the other breeds suddenly realised that they had been had!
The Mangies have been stealing their bones from right under their noses in broad daylight. To make matters worse, the Mangies are even bullying other weaker Mangies to show their own power.
As time passes and population in Dogland grows, the Mangies started boasting about their so-called victories in their forays into various unknown territories using their stolen resources.
Now, the other breeds are becoming disgruntled. Many are growling and baring their teeth at the Mangies behind their backs.
However, few are brave enough to actually face up to the Mangies. Those who actually did were dragged by their scruffs to be locked in the pound and ultimately silenced.
Many dogs have given up and are even moving on to other greener pastures where pack leaders do not openly and officially discriminate against different breeds and all breeds are treated fairly. The less able ones could not do anything but stay on and hoped for a change in pack leaders.
In the meantime, things become worse. The Mangies became fat and lazy and had taken to ordering all the other breeds to do their work for them. Whoever dared to refuse the Mangies were immediately taken to the dog pound.
A clever group of Beagles then started exposing the cruel and corrupted practices of the Mangies for all to see. This did not bode well for the Mangies. Angered by the hard-hitting facts being presented for all to see, the Mangies started a conspiracy plan for the downfall of the Beagles. This includes smearing their reputation, dragging some of them to the dog pound and launching all sorts of attack plans to silence the Beagles.
However, instead of being frightened into silence, the Beagles continued to be even more aggressively. Realising that the ripples of dissatisfaction are growing into huge waves, the Mangies launched into a different game plan instead.
They started throwing out tiny bits of bacons to satisfy the disgruntled dogs. They promised big pieces of steaks and choice cuts and bigger bones. They pretended to drag a few errant Mangies into the pound to prove that the Mangies are really good leaders but had the misfortune to be plagued with a few rogue Mangies.
The dogs, being loyal Doglanders, believed the Mangies. They thought the Mangies would not lie to them. The Beagles were not easily fooled but found that the other dogs have been easily won over by cheap promises.
A not so peaceful quiet settled on Dogland as the Mangies continue to lie and trick the other dogs into letting them continue as pack leaders while the Beagles rack their brains for a way to finally expose the Mangies for who they really are.
Stay tune for Part Two of the Dogland stories....
Tuesday
I am addicted!
I discovered Facebook recently and I have to say, I am absolutely addicted! It is fun, fun, fun. I have always been very lazy when it comes to updating things in Friendster, Multiply and etc.
So, when someone invited me to join Facebook, I was reluctant. I mean, if I could not really be bothered with updating Friendster and all, what's the point of signing up for another one, right?
Anyway, out of curiousity, I joined and boy, am I glad I did!
Facebook has so many fun applications in it that I could spend virtually hours looking through the stuffs. Now, excuse me, I need to add more applications to my profile...
So, when someone invited me to join Facebook, I was reluctant. I mean, if I could not really be bothered with updating Friendster and all, what's the point of signing up for another one, right?
Anyway, out of curiousity, I joined and boy, am I glad I did!
Facebook has so many fun applications in it that I could spend virtually hours looking through the stuffs. Now, excuse me, I need to add more applications to my profile...
Saturday
Toilets and such
I just do not understand some women. They obviously do not know how to use the public toilet. By this I meant those who squat on the seats of sitting toilets.
Like, hello! If you want to squat, go use the squatting toilets. Sure, everyone blames the government, the premise owner, everyone else except themselves over the state of cleanliness of the public toilets here. Have they ever stopped to think it may just be their own fault?
The toilet may have a live-in cleaner but it will not remain clean if users dirty it up. There are those who squat on the seats leaving their shoe prints and scuffing the seats, those who neglected to flush, those who adorn the doors and walls with their artistic writings, those who do not know how to use the tap, those who feel inclined to let the pipe spray water all over the floor, those who throw rubbish, from tissue to used sanitary napkins, on the floor of the toilets and many more.
Then, these very irresponsible people dared to voice out over how dirty the public toilets here are. I have personally seen how an extremely clean and dry toilet turned into a smelly, dirty and wet toilet after one person used it!
When I visited US and Australia a while back, the toilets there are clean. Even public toilets in public areas such as Disneyland are clean. The floors are dry and there are no litter. Best of all, no shoe prints on toilet seats!
So, please. Stop blaming all and sundry and look to yourselves first!
Like, hello! If you want to squat, go use the squatting toilets. Sure, everyone blames the government, the premise owner, everyone else except themselves over the state of cleanliness of the public toilets here. Have they ever stopped to think it may just be their own fault?
The toilet may have a live-in cleaner but it will not remain clean if users dirty it up. There are those who squat on the seats leaving their shoe prints and scuffing the seats, those who neglected to flush, those who adorn the doors and walls with their artistic writings, those who do not know how to use the tap, those who feel inclined to let the pipe spray water all over the floor, those who throw rubbish, from tissue to used sanitary napkins, on the floor of the toilets and many more.
Then, these very irresponsible people dared to voice out over how dirty the public toilets here are. I have personally seen how an extremely clean and dry toilet turned into a smelly, dirty and wet toilet after one person used it!
When I visited US and Australia a while back, the toilets there are clean. Even public toilets in public areas such as Disneyland are clean. The floors are dry and there are no litter. Best of all, no shoe prints on toilet seats!
So, please. Stop blaming all and sundry and look to yourselves first!
Sunday
Thanks but NO thanks!
I know well-meaning so-called advices are simply..err.. well-meaning. But these unwanted advices often grates on my nerves and makes me want to rip out every strand of my hair or worse, threaten physical harm to the person who dispenses these advices as if they are the official superior being put on earth to help all humankind with their unwanted advices.
I don't know about all of you out there, but I find such irritating, annoying specimens a real pain in the you-know-where! The most irritating advices I get are those unsolicited ones and the more obviously 'Duh' ones such as 'Don't drink rat poison, it is dangerous' or 'Be careful when eating fish because you may choke on the bones'. Ok, so far, nobody advised me about the rat poison yet but so far, I do not yet have any inclination to down a glass of rat poison for fun. Unless of course I get plagued by too many of such irritating advices, I may be made to feel inclined towards ending my misery with creative uses of the rat poison. It's not my fault if the adviser in question decides not to follow his/her own advice.
Back to annoying advices and the 'supreme' advisers. Who the heck do they think they are with their unwanted, unsolicited, unappreciated, totally irritating 'words of annoyance'? Look, if I need any advice, I will ask for it. Please do not trouble your tiny little brain, which is incidentally full of annoying advices, to blurb out all the 'little gems' of yours to me.
The reasons are simple:
1) Unsolicited advices are exactly like unsolicited spam - it irritates the hell out of me and it makes me more inclined to strangle you than thank you.
2) Stupid advices given just because you thought you know it all - well, I have news for you! You DON'T know it all and shut up already!
3) Obvious advices given because you thought I have no common sense or you don't have any common sense and thought everyone is the same as you - Newsflash! You may be stupid enough think fish has no bones or rat poison is an equivalent to a martini, write it all down to remind yourself instead of spouting it out to everyone and anyone who would listen!
4) Annoying nerve-grating advices disguised as 'well-meaning' advices - all I can say is that thanks but NO THANKS. However well-meaning you thought your advice is, to me it is just an annoying interfering specimen poking its nose into where it doesn't belong.
My final say is if I need any advice I will ask for it so in the meantime, shut the heck up and let me deal with whatever it is in my own way!
I don't know about all of you out there, but I find such irritating, annoying specimens a real pain in the you-know-where! The most irritating advices I get are those unsolicited ones and the more obviously 'Duh' ones such as 'Don't drink rat poison, it is dangerous' or 'Be careful when eating fish because you may choke on the bones'. Ok, so far, nobody advised me about the rat poison yet but so far, I do not yet have any inclination to down a glass of rat poison for fun. Unless of course I get plagued by too many of such irritating advices, I may be made to feel inclined towards ending my misery with creative uses of the rat poison. It's not my fault if the adviser in question decides not to follow his/her own advice.
Back to annoying advices and the 'supreme' advisers. Who the heck do they think they are with their unwanted, unsolicited, unappreciated, totally irritating 'words of annoyance'? Look, if I need any advice, I will ask for it. Please do not trouble your tiny little brain, which is incidentally full of annoying advices, to blurb out all the 'little gems' of yours to me.
The reasons are simple:
1) Unsolicited advices are exactly like unsolicited spam - it irritates the hell out of me and it makes me more inclined to strangle you than thank you.
2) Stupid advices given just because you thought you know it all - well, I have news for you! You DON'T know it all and shut up already!
3) Obvious advices given because you thought I have no common sense or you don't have any common sense and thought everyone is the same as you - Newsflash! You may be stupid enough think fish has no bones or rat poison is an equivalent to a martini, write it all down to remind yourself instead of spouting it out to everyone and anyone who would listen!
4) Annoying nerve-grating advices disguised as 'well-meaning' advices - all I can say is that thanks but NO THANKS. However well-meaning you thought your advice is, to me it is just an annoying interfering specimen poking its nose into where it doesn't belong.
My final say is if I need any advice I will ask for it so in the meantime, shut the heck up and let me deal with whatever it is in my own way!
Thursday
What an absolutely sick b@#$%^&
That is all I can say about the brutal sexual assault and murder of the eight year old girl, the news of which were splashed across the newspaper these few days.
Despite having to read and sometimes cover such things, it still boggles my mind to think that there are such monsters impersonating as humans in this world.
What type of a sick beast could do such a thing to a little girl? And the worse part of this is that this is not the first of such cases. There have been many others over the years. What about countless other missing children whose fates nobody knows about?
In times like this, I wonder if I did wrong my bringing my son into this world. Why bring an innocent into this cruel unforgiving world full of monsters and beasts who prey on small children or those weaker than them?
Though these monsters and beasts may not even get their just punishment now but I am sure, when the time comes, they will get what they deserve.
I will pray for the little girl's soul so that she will rest in peace and hopefully not remember the torture she went through before her death.
Despite having to read and sometimes cover such things, it still boggles my mind to think that there are such monsters impersonating as humans in this world.
What type of a sick beast could do such a thing to a little girl? And the worse part of this is that this is not the first of such cases. There have been many others over the years. What about countless other missing children whose fates nobody knows about?
In times like this, I wonder if I did wrong my bringing my son into this world. Why bring an innocent into this cruel unforgiving world full of monsters and beasts who prey on small children or those weaker than them?
Though these monsters and beasts may not even get their just punishment now but I am sure, when the time comes, they will get what they deserve.
I will pray for the little girl's soul so that she will rest in peace and hopefully not remember the torture she went through before her death.
Sunday
A full rant
Warning! This blogger is not responsible for any slips of profanity and expletives in the course of this rant. Readers are advised to exercise caution when reading this rant. Anyone who reads this do so at their own risk. This blogger is not responsible for any corruption of innocent minds and shall not be liable for any legal suits arising from this post.
First and foremost I would like to clear the popular misconception that journalism is a glamourous job. As a full time journalist for the past decade or so, let me tell you in no uncertain terms that journalism is NOT all about glamour!
Honestly, I do not know where these absolute morons get this stupid, moronic, idiotic idea in their tiny, closed minds! Must be a constant diet of watching the idiot box (otherwise popularly known by its two initials, TV) which tends to glamourise anything and everything.
I mean it is bad enough having to put up with the stress of this peanut-paying job what with having to deal with morons and idiots which range from politicians to government servants to even annoying NGOs on a daily basis. But to have strangers and even acquiantances coming up to me and going all green with envy over my so-called 'glamourous' job and preaching me about 'looking beyond the glamour to help people'. That absolutely takes the cake.
Well, excuse me for choosing this job. Oh, I am all for helping people but let me ask one question, what in the f*&% has my job got to do with 'helping people'? Writing sob stories of poor unfortunate people to be published in the paper, you say? Well, again, excuse me but do I look like I own the damn newspaper? Do I look like I have any say in what I am suppose to write or what articles gets published? If in fact I do own the newspaper, do you think I'd be a lowly paid overworked journalist???? If you are so stupid to believe that, then so be it!
Let me say this to you instead, being a journalist is just like any other job and we ALL still have to answer to our bosses who ultimately answer to the MD / GM / directors / shareholders. So, if you want your sob story published (regardless of whether it is about the gigantic hole the size of a mouse in front of your house or about the faulty lamp post two streets away from your house), go talk to the editors and the newspaper owners. Not us, the journalists, who are only paid to do our jobs according to our company's visions and missions. Kapish? Understand?
And where the heck does 'glamour' fit into the whole scheme of journalism anyway? Even watching the idiot box should educate you on how journalists were treated especially at crime or accident scenes. You call being chased away with a broom, having a door slammed in our faces, being called all sorts of names in all sorts of languages, being treated to the 'beautiful' scene of blood and gore as a result of human's evil deeds and many such things glamourous??? Really, is it all that glamourous? Is it glamourous to stand outside a mortuary waiting for the post mortem result of a murder? Is it glamourous to call umpteenth people and go through tonnes of red tape in order to get a response over some issue? Is it glamourous to be accused of misquoting a certain person just because the person wants to retract his statement? Is it glamourous to be paid mere peanuts for the amount of running around and stress we have to undergo each and every day to meet deadlines and come up with news? So what if my byline appear in national newspapers? It is not as if I get paid for each and every byline that appears in the paper. I still get paid on a fixed monthly salary that is reviewed every year end with only a minimal increase each year. (For the less enlightened, bylines refer to the single line with the journalist's name tagged onto any article in the newspaper)
Enough said, the next person who comes up to me and tell me that I 'should look beyond the glamour of my job' should know that I will not be responsible for any bodily harm afflicted on him or her.
Rant over.
First and foremost I would like to clear the popular misconception that journalism is a glamourous job. As a full time journalist for the past decade or so, let me tell you in no uncertain terms that journalism is NOT all about glamour!
Honestly, I do not know where these absolute morons get this stupid, moronic, idiotic idea in their tiny, closed minds! Must be a constant diet of watching the idiot box (otherwise popularly known by its two initials, TV) which tends to glamourise anything and everything.
I mean it is bad enough having to put up with the stress of this peanut-paying job what with having to deal with morons and idiots which range from politicians to government servants to even annoying NGOs on a daily basis. But to have strangers and even acquiantances coming up to me and going all green with envy over my so-called 'glamourous' job and preaching me about 'looking beyond the glamour to help people'. That absolutely takes the cake.
Well, excuse me for choosing this job. Oh, I am all for helping people but let me ask one question, what in the f*&% has my job got to do with 'helping people'? Writing sob stories of poor unfortunate people to be published in the paper, you say? Well, again, excuse me but do I look like I own the damn newspaper? Do I look like I have any say in what I am suppose to write or what articles gets published? If in fact I do own the newspaper, do you think I'd be a lowly paid overworked journalist???? If you are so stupid to believe that, then so be it!
Let me say this to you instead, being a journalist is just like any other job and we ALL still have to answer to our bosses who ultimately answer to the MD / GM / directors / shareholders. So, if you want your sob story published (regardless of whether it is about the gigantic hole the size of a mouse in front of your house or about the faulty lamp post two streets away from your house), go talk to the editors and the newspaper owners. Not us, the journalists, who are only paid to do our jobs according to our company's visions and missions. Kapish? Understand?
And where the heck does 'glamour' fit into the whole scheme of journalism anyway? Even watching the idiot box should educate you on how journalists were treated especially at crime or accident scenes. You call being chased away with a broom, having a door slammed in our faces, being called all sorts of names in all sorts of languages, being treated to the 'beautiful' scene of blood and gore as a result of human's evil deeds and many such things glamourous??? Really, is it all that glamourous? Is it glamourous to stand outside a mortuary waiting for the post mortem result of a murder? Is it glamourous to call umpteenth people and go through tonnes of red tape in order to get a response over some issue? Is it glamourous to be accused of misquoting a certain person just because the person wants to retract his statement? Is it glamourous to be paid mere peanuts for the amount of running around and stress we have to undergo each and every day to meet deadlines and come up with news? So what if my byline appear in national newspapers? It is not as if I get paid for each and every byline that appears in the paper. I still get paid on a fixed monthly salary that is reviewed every year end with only a minimal increase each year. (For the less enlightened, bylines refer to the single line with the journalist's name tagged onto any article in the newspaper)
Enough said, the next person who comes up to me and tell me that I 'should look beyond the glamour of my job' should know that I will not be responsible for any bodily harm afflicted on him or her.
Rant over.
Friday
The difference between bitchiness and rudeness Pt 2
This entry, I will go into the various lamer than lame statements we get in our otherwise boring lives...
Lame statement: Wow..you are a journalist. It is soooo glamourous.
Bitchy retort: Yeah, chasing after the police, being crushed in huge crowds trying to get to a certain politician to make him talk, waiting for hours on end at the mortuary, getting screamed at by the bosses for being scooped, being the receiving end of colourful expletives by people who hated the media, looking at dead bodies at crime/ accident scenes...I am sure it is a very glamourous job. NOT!
Lame attempt of a joke: oh my, you have a tattoo. That makes you sorta like a 'gangster' huh? heh heh.
Bitchy retort: Ya. I am a gangster member. In fact I just became a member and part of the requirement is to have a tattoo and I have to kill someone as my first 'job'. Do you want to volunteer?
Stupid question/statement: You breastfeed your son? Do you know it will make your breasts sag?
Bitchy retort: Do you know there is a such a thing as gravity and no matter what you do, save for plastic surgery, everything will eventually sag whether you want to or not? It has nothing to do with breastfeeding, duh.
Rude question: My...(insert any close relative)...graduated from the University of ....(insert any top overseas university of choice). So where did you graduate from? (said with a looking-down-the-nose sneer)
Bitchy retort: I didn't go to university but what is it to you? Oh, I forgot, you didn't go to university too and wanted to ride on the successes of others. Too bad, you didn't get a degree either so shut the heck up.
That's it for today. Maybe there is more to come. We shall see....And no, these questions are not only from irritating annoying aunties but also from other specimens who make me want to rip my hair off in absolute annoyance.
Lame statement: Wow..you are a journalist. It is soooo glamourous.
Bitchy retort: Yeah, chasing after the police, being crushed in huge crowds trying to get to a certain politician to make him talk, waiting for hours on end at the mortuary, getting screamed at by the bosses for being scooped, being the receiving end of colourful expletives by people who hated the media, looking at dead bodies at crime/ accident scenes...I am sure it is a very glamourous job. NOT!
Lame attempt of a joke: oh my, you have a tattoo. That makes you sorta like a 'gangster' huh? heh heh.
Bitchy retort: Ya. I am a gangster member. In fact I just became a member and part of the requirement is to have a tattoo and I have to kill someone as my first 'job'. Do you want to volunteer?
Stupid question/statement: You breastfeed your son? Do you know it will make your breasts sag?
Bitchy retort: Do you know there is a such a thing as gravity and no matter what you do, save for plastic surgery, everything will eventually sag whether you want to or not? It has nothing to do with breastfeeding, duh.
Rude question: My...(insert any close relative)...graduated from the University of ....(insert any top overseas university of choice). So where did you graduate from? (said with a looking-down-the-nose sneer)
Bitchy retort: I didn't go to university but what is it to you? Oh, I forgot, you didn't go to university too and wanted to ride on the successes of others. Too bad, you didn't get a degree either so shut the heck up.
That's it for today. Maybe there is more to come. We shall see....And no, these questions are not only from irritating annoying aunties but also from other specimens who make me want to rip my hair off in absolute annoyance.
Thursday
The difference between bitchiness and rudeness
Situation #1
Rude question: Have you put on weight?
Bitchy answer: Not as much as you have. Just look at those layers of fat on you!
#2
Rude Q: When are you getting married / pregnant?
Bitchy A: I'm not sure. So how many times do you have sex with your boyfriend/husband each week? What sexual positions do you like? Do you ever achieve orgasm when you have sex? (asked in rapid succession)
#3
Rude Q: How much do you earn a month? My..(insert any relative)...earns at least RM20k each month.
Bitchy A: Enough. So, how much do you plan to bring to your grave? Do you think you can bring all that money to hell when you die?
#4
Rude comment: You should go on a diet for your health.
Bitchy comeback: You are right, I should go on a diet entirely different from yours! Just look at you.
#5
Lame comment: You looked so different now from when you were a toddler.
Bitchy A: Well, hello! I grew up.
Look out for more rude and bitchy Qs and As in future.
Rude question: Have you put on weight?
Bitchy answer: Not as much as you have. Just look at those layers of fat on you!
#2
Rude Q: When are you getting married / pregnant?
Bitchy A: I'm not sure. So how many times do you have sex with your boyfriend/husband each week? What sexual positions do you like? Do you ever achieve orgasm when you have sex? (asked in rapid succession)
#3
Rude Q: How much do you earn a month? My..(insert any relative)...earns at least RM20k each month.
Bitchy A: Enough. So, how much do you plan to bring to your grave? Do you think you can bring all that money to hell when you die?
#4
Rude comment: You should go on a diet for your health.
Bitchy comeback: You are right, I should go on a diet entirely different from yours! Just look at you.
#5
Lame comment: You looked so different now from when you were a toddler.
Bitchy A: Well, hello! I grew up.
Look out for more rude and bitchy Qs and As in future.
World Breastfeeding Week
The first week of August each year is the World Breastfeeding Week to encourage and create more awareness on breastfeeding. It is celebrated between August 1 and 7 in more than 120 countries worldwide this year with the theme 'Breastfeeding: The 1st Hour - Early initiation and exclusive breastfeeding for six months can save more than one million babies!'
In conjunction with this, two events, one local and one global, will be held on Aug 5 and 8 to encourage breastfeeding, create awareness on the benefits of breastfeeding and take part in the Global Breastfeeding Wave.
The first event, jointly organised by Penang Adventist Hospital and World Alliance for Breastfeeding Action (WABA), will be held at Level 7, Gurney Plaza on Aug 5 from 2pm to 5pm.
The highlight of the event will be a mass gathering of breastfeeding mothers, babies, supporters and families at 3pm and door gifts will be given to the first 100 mothers.
There will also be two breastfeeding-related contests, a breastfeeding photo and caption contest and a breastfeeding slogan contest, where winners get to walk away with attractive prizes.
Other activities lined up for the event include breastfeeding counselling for new mothers, breastfeeding certificate presentation, baby obstacle race, performances and even a competition for fathers to see how fast they are able to put the baby in a sling.
The Global Breastfeeding Wave will be held at 10am on Aug 8 at the Penang Caring Society Complex as an inaugural world attempt for mothers from different participating countries to breastfeed their babies for one minute.
The event will be held in collaboration with Penang Adventist Hospital, Penang State Health Department and International Women’s Association of Penang and is supported by the Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development.
Other events such as free counselling, health checks for mother and child and video screenings will also be held during the event and registration for the event starts from 8.30am.
The criteria for participating mothers are that they are still breastfeeding their infants or young child. The Global Breastfeeding Wave will start from New Zealand on their time followed by the next time zone and so on until the Wave hits Malaysia at 10am and then it will pass the Wave on to the next time zone and countries. Among other participating countries are US, Uganda, India, UK, Greece, Canada and the Dominican Republic.
This first ever Global Breastfeeding Wave is organised in hopes of creating the Guinness World Record on Synchronised Breastfeeding in Multiple Sites in an effort to make policy makers and communities recognise the importance of breastfeeding initiation during the first hour of birth.
The Global Breastfeeding Wave also aimed to make breastfeeding a norm, to develop links with mothers and breastfeeding advocates, to create awareness on the importance of breastfeeding in the world, to encourage countries to ensure the implementation of better infant and young child feeding practices and better suport facilities for breastfeeding mothers and to help nations cooperate in reviving the breastfeeding culture.
For further details, please contact Sabrina Sunderajj at WABA, 04-658 4816 or 012-415 6446, email: globalbreastfeedingwave@yahoo.co.uk. WABA was formed on February 14, 1991. It is a global network of organisations and individuals who believe breastfeeding is the right of all children and mothers and who dedicate themselves to protect, promote and support this right. WABA acts on the Innocenti Declaration and works in liaison with UNICEF.
In conjunction with this, two events, one local and one global, will be held on Aug 5 and 8 to encourage breastfeeding, create awareness on the benefits of breastfeeding and take part in the Global Breastfeeding Wave.
The first event, jointly organised by Penang Adventist Hospital and World Alliance for Breastfeeding Action (WABA), will be held at Level 7, Gurney Plaza on Aug 5 from 2pm to 5pm.
The highlight of the event will be a mass gathering of breastfeeding mothers, babies, supporters and families at 3pm and door gifts will be given to the first 100 mothers.
There will also be two breastfeeding-related contests, a breastfeeding photo and caption contest and a breastfeeding slogan contest, where winners get to walk away with attractive prizes.
Other activities lined up for the event include breastfeeding counselling for new mothers, breastfeeding certificate presentation, baby obstacle race, performances and even a competition for fathers to see how fast they are able to put the baby in a sling.
The Global Breastfeeding Wave will be held at 10am on Aug 8 at the Penang Caring Society Complex as an inaugural world attempt for mothers from different participating countries to breastfeed their babies for one minute.
The event will be held in collaboration with Penang Adventist Hospital, Penang State Health Department and International Women’s Association of Penang and is supported by the Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development.
Other events such as free counselling, health checks for mother and child and video screenings will also be held during the event and registration for the event starts from 8.30am.
The criteria for participating mothers are that they are still breastfeeding their infants or young child. The Global Breastfeeding Wave will start from New Zealand on their time followed by the next time zone and so on until the Wave hits Malaysia at 10am and then it will pass the Wave on to the next time zone and countries. Among other participating countries are US, Uganda, India, UK, Greece, Canada and the Dominican Republic.
This first ever Global Breastfeeding Wave is organised in hopes of creating the Guinness World Record on Synchronised Breastfeeding in Multiple Sites in an effort to make policy makers and communities recognise the importance of breastfeeding initiation during the first hour of birth.
The Global Breastfeeding Wave also aimed to make breastfeeding a norm, to develop links with mothers and breastfeeding advocates, to create awareness on the importance of breastfeeding in the world, to encourage countries to ensure the implementation of better infant and young child feeding practices and better suport facilities for breastfeeding mothers and to help nations cooperate in reviving the breastfeeding culture.
For further details, please contact Sabrina Sunderajj at WABA, 04-658 4816 or 012-415 6446, email: globalbreastfeedingwave@yahoo.co.uk. WABA was formed on February 14, 1991. It is a global network of organisations and individuals who believe breastfeeding is the right of all children and mothers and who dedicate themselves to protect, promote and support this right. WABA acts on the Innocenti Declaration and works in liaison with UNICEF.
Monday
Straight A culture
In recent times, I find it really strange that more and more parents are obsessed with their children attaining as many As as possible in school and public examinations. What's the deal anyway?
It is true that this is not a new phenomenon as when I was in school aeons ago, my father expected good results from me and often, relatives would ask me 'How many As did you get?" whenever the public examinations results are out.
However, the situation now has worsen. Children as young as four years old were expected to get excellent academic results in kindy/nursery or else face the wrath of their parents.
This is scary! These parents, presumably, thought the stress they place on their children was just a way to ensure their children have a brighter future; albeit with good academic results.
Well, hello there! Straight-A students may not necessarily become hugely successful while Bs and Cs students don't always end up as roadside sweepers or beggars. In case they haven't noticed, Bill Gates dropped out of college and was not a straight A student. Okay, some may say it is an isolated special case, let's look a little closer to home.
The late Loh Boon Siew (famous tycoon in Penang) was not educated and look how he ended up. There are also quite a lot of owners of huge local corporations from developers to factories who are not highly educated. Some couldn't even speak proper English! They were not straight A students and yet they are so successful they formed big corporations and some of these companies are even listed.
So, what's this preoccupation and obsession over academic achievements? According to a child psychiatrist, this undue stress and pressure on children to perform well academically from such a tender age will only cause more damage to the child. In some extreme cases, five and six year olds have been known to want to commit suicide because of all the stress over their academic achievements.
These children are robbed of their childhood thanks to the endless tuition classes, homeworks and whatnots to ensure they earn more As.
Where is the time for them to play, to imagine, to be children?
Where is the time for them to be creative, to express themselves, to build their own self esteem, to enjoy the fun part of life?
Why are young children being taught that life is all about getting As in examinations? Whatever happened to taking time to enjoy the simple pleasures of life such as enjoying nature with a walk in the park? Or reading storybooks for enjoyment and not for academic purposes? Or going for a picnic by the beach? Or even playing badminton with the neighbourhood children?
Are the children being taught the right thing at all with all this exam-orientated obsession? Are they taught to form their own opinions, to troubleshoot problems and try to solve it on their own, to be more creative, to interact well with others, to be kind to others, to question whatever is told to them instead of just memorising whatever the teacher said?
What about basic living skills such as how to communicate with others, good manners, knowing right from wrong, etc?
It is no wonder that company managers are complaining that uni graduates of today, especially those with straight As in school, have virtually no interpersonal skills and when it comes to problem solving or brainstorming sessions, they are at a total loss.
Why? Simple, it is because they were taught from young to just memorise facts and score As. They were taught to be like computers via tuitions and extra classes. They were not given a chance to think for themselves, to question, to voice out and to form their own opinions.
Of course, our education system is partly to be blamed but if most parents seemed to think that scoring As is the be all and end all, then, it isn't only the government's fault. It is everyone's fault.
This is indeed sad. So, I make this solemn promise to my son and any other children I may have in future that I would never force them to get As in their exams. Sure, education is important but living life to to the fullest is more important.
I would never rob them of their childhood.
It is true that this is not a new phenomenon as when I was in school aeons ago, my father expected good results from me and often, relatives would ask me 'How many As did you get?" whenever the public examinations results are out.
However, the situation now has worsen. Children as young as four years old were expected to get excellent academic results in kindy/nursery or else face the wrath of their parents.
This is scary! These parents, presumably, thought the stress they place on their children was just a way to ensure their children have a brighter future; albeit with good academic results.
Well, hello there! Straight-A students may not necessarily become hugely successful while Bs and Cs students don't always end up as roadside sweepers or beggars. In case they haven't noticed, Bill Gates dropped out of college and was not a straight A student. Okay, some may say it is an isolated special case, let's look a little closer to home.
The late Loh Boon Siew (famous tycoon in Penang) was not educated and look how he ended up. There are also quite a lot of owners of huge local corporations from developers to factories who are not highly educated. Some couldn't even speak proper English! They were not straight A students and yet they are so successful they formed big corporations and some of these companies are even listed.
So, what's this preoccupation and obsession over academic achievements? According to a child psychiatrist, this undue stress and pressure on children to perform well academically from such a tender age will only cause more damage to the child. In some extreme cases, five and six year olds have been known to want to commit suicide because of all the stress over their academic achievements.
These children are robbed of their childhood thanks to the endless tuition classes, homeworks and whatnots to ensure they earn more As.
Where is the time for them to play, to imagine, to be children?
Where is the time for them to be creative, to express themselves, to build their own self esteem, to enjoy the fun part of life?
Why are young children being taught that life is all about getting As in examinations? Whatever happened to taking time to enjoy the simple pleasures of life such as enjoying nature with a walk in the park? Or reading storybooks for enjoyment and not for academic purposes? Or going for a picnic by the beach? Or even playing badminton with the neighbourhood children?
Are the children being taught the right thing at all with all this exam-orientated obsession? Are they taught to form their own opinions, to troubleshoot problems and try to solve it on their own, to be more creative, to interact well with others, to be kind to others, to question whatever is told to them instead of just memorising whatever the teacher said?
What about basic living skills such as how to communicate with others, good manners, knowing right from wrong, etc?
It is no wonder that company managers are complaining that uni graduates of today, especially those with straight As in school, have virtually no interpersonal skills and when it comes to problem solving or brainstorming sessions, they are at a total loss.
Why? Simple, it is because they were taught from young to just memorise facts and score As. They were taught to be like computers via tuitions and extra classes. They were not given a chance to think for themselves, to question, to voice out and to form their own opinions.
Of course, our education system is partly to be blamed but if most parents seemed to think that scoring As is the be all and end all, then, it isn't only the government's fault. It is everyone's fault.
This is indeed sad. So, I make this solemn promise to my son and any other children I may have in future that I would never force them to get As in their exams. Sure, education is important but living life to to the fullest is more important.
I would never rob them of their childhood.
Managing grief
Recently, I came into contact with grieving families and this reminded me of the time when I was told of my mother's sudden death almost two years ago.
At that time, I was nine months pregnant and my mom was halfway across the world. Sure, my hubby and relatives tried to console me but it was still a very difficult time for me.
There I was happily planning for the arrival of my firstborn when the bubble burst with the news via email that my mother had collapsed from a suspected stroke, went into a coma and within two days, died without regaining consciousness.
It all occurred within the Christmas weekend of 2005 and my mother died on Boxing Day. Christmas will never ever be the same again. I may not be a Christian but I had always loved this particular festive season due to wonderful memories celebrating it with my mother and neighbours when I was a child.
At that time, though it is what they thought was for my own good, I was not allowed to grief properly for my mom. I was not allowed to cry because I may distress the baby. I was shielded and kept occupied so my thoughts do not wander to my mother's death. I could not attend her funeral or memorial service because in my condition, I was not allowed on any plane, much less travel all the way across the globe. I was denied the chance to say goodbye, to see her for the last time, to close a chapter in my life, so to speak.
Now, it is coming to the second year since my mom departed this world and I still missed her. Recently some relatives over there contacted me about taking back my mom's earthly belongings which was stored by one of her well-meaning friends. Again, the grief and regrets started swelling within me.
It was like a floodgate was opened and all the feelings come pouring in endlessly. I could not help feeling depressed and missing her more than ever. I felt like bursting into tears over her death and actually grief for her. But I did not. I kept the tears in just like two years ago, fearing people would not understand my need for this time to finally really let go, to finally accept the fact that she is gone for good.
Often enough when my son does something funny or cute, I instinctively stored it in my memory bank so that I could tell my mom about it. Too late, I realised mom is no longer there. She is no longer a phone call away. I can no longer shoot an email to her with picture attachments. In fact, she never did get the chance to meet my son, her first grandchild. That was my biggest regret, my mom never got to see her first grandchild before she left. I have so many questions to ask her, so many things to say to her still but now it is too late.
Many have told me to move on and be glad that she did not suffer at all. I have moved on and life is in fact quite wonderful now but still, the empty void and pain of loss remains. I felt as if I have lost something vital. Perhaps time will one day lessen the pain and fill the void but till then, I will probably continue to miss her, my mom, the woman who loved us unconditionally, loved to read and most of all, loved animals.
At that time, I was nine months pregnant and my mom was halfway across the world. Sure, my hubby and relatives tried to console me but it was still a very difficult time for me.
There I was happily planning for the arrival of my firstborn when the bubble burst with the news via email that my mother had collapsed from a suspected stroke, went into a coma and within two days, died without regaining consciousness.
It all occurred within the Christmas weekend of 2005 and my mother died on Boxing Day. Christmas will never ever be the same again. I may not be a Christian but I had always loved this particular festive season due to wonderful memories celebrating it with my mother and neighbours when I was a child.
At that time, though it is what they thought was for my own good, I was not allowed to grief properly for my mom. I was not allowed to cry because I may distress the baby. I was shielded and kept occupied so my thoughts do not wander to my mother's death. I could not attend her funeral or memorial service because in my condition, I was not allowed on any plane, much less travel all the way across the globe. I was denied the chance to say goodbye, to see her for the last time, to close a chapter in my life, so to speak.
Now, it is coming to the second year since my mom departed this world and I still missed her. Recently some relatives over there contacted me about taking back my mom's earthly belongings which was stored by one of her well-meaning friends. Again, the grief and regrets started swelling within me.
It was like a floodgate was opened and all the feelings come pouring in endlessly. I could not help feeling depressed and missing her more than ever. I felt like bursting into tears over her death and actually grief for her. But I did not. I kept the tears in just like two years ago, fearing people would not understand my need for this time to finally really let go, to finally accept the fact that she is gone for good.
Often enough when my son does something funny or cute, I instinctively stored it in my memory bank so that I could tell my mom about it. Too late, I realised mom is no longer there. She is no longer a phone call away. I can no longer shoot an email to her with picture attachments. In fact, she never did get the chance to meet my son, her first grandchild. That was my biggest regret, my mom never got to see her first grandchild before she left. I have so many questions to ask her, so many things to say to her still but now it is too late.
Many have told me to move on and be glad that she did not suffer at all. I have moved on and life is in fact quite wonderful now but still, the empty void and pain of loss remains. I felt as if I have lost something vital. Perhaps time will one day lessen the pain and fill the void but till then, I will probably continue to miss her, my mom, the woman who loved us unconditionally, loved to read and most of all, loved animals.
Thursday
Yayyy!!!
Finally! After weeks of trying unsuccessfully, I am able to post something! So I am finally back to blogging here again! Yippeee!!!!!
Thick deafening silence
I have not been able to enter a single blog entry into this site for more than a month now and I am at my wit's end. So I am again trying to enter a post for the zillionth time in hopes that it will make it to see the light of the internet.
I have contacted the administrator also several times and nothing was done. zilch. Nada. Absolute silence. A knife could easily slice through this silence.
What in the world is wrong with this site and why Blogger isn't doing anything about it? Well, beats me! I have surfed endlessly in the Help section and found no solution except to contact them and get them to do something. By them, I meant, the blardy Blogger administrators or technical support or whatevertheycallthemselves lah!
Well, a lot of help they are! If worse comes to worse, I will probably have to download whatever stuff I posted earlier, which is not much since I wasn't a very active blogger anyway, and start another blog! What a bother. How totally irritating. How absolutely inefficient of Blogger support or whatever.
I am going to click on the publish post button now......
I have contacted the administrator also several times and nothing was done. zilch. Nada. Absolute silence. A knife could easily slice through this silence.
What in the world is wrong with this site and why Blogger isn't doing anything about it? Well, beats me! I have surfed endlessly in the Help section and found no solution except to contact them and get them to do something. By them, I meant, the blardy Blogger administrators or technical support or whatevertheycallthemselves lah!
Well, a lot of help they are! If worse comes to worse, I will probably have to download whatever stuff I posted earlier, which is not much since I wasn't a very active blogger anyway, and start another blog! What a bother. How totally irritating. How absolutely inefficient of Blogger support or whatever.
I am going to click on the publish post button now......
Saturday
Baby talk
This entry is all about my baby, Rayden, who turned 16months old this month.Warning to those who can't stomach reading mushy motherly ravings on her precious baby...get out before you regret reading this!He is just so cute with his endearing baby language that I could not resist posting some of his special words here.He calls me 'mummy' and 'mama'. At first he loves uttering 'mummy,mummy,mummy,mummy' non-stop but now when I ask him to say mummy or mama, he cheekily shakes his head and say 'daddy'.Now, he just loves saying the word 'daddy' repeatedly and has called pictures (of any kind, framed or even in magazines) 'daddy' just because once I pointed out a picture of his father and told him it is daddy.He loves to watch birds and he would point at any flying animal, bird or butterfly or insect or even a lizard on the wall, and calls it 'boehrd boehrd'.
He also loves to play ball and everything round is considered a 'bahl bahl' including the round lamps lining the ceiling of my apartment building.He can differentiate between cats (meow) and dogs ('daegy') but when it comes to bigger animals like horses and cows, he insists that those are
He also loves to play ball and everything round is considered a 'bahl bahl' including the round lamps lining the ceiling of my apartment building.He can differentiate between cats (meow) and dogs ('daegy') but when it comes to bigger animals like horses and cows, he insists that those are
also 'daegy'.
He loves oranges and tomatoes and each time he spot me opening the fridge, he would rush over and ask for 'o-eng' for orange or 'toh-toh' for tomatoes.
He loves oranges and tomatoes and each time he spot me opening the fridge, he would rush over and ask for 'o-eng' for orange or 'toh-toh' for tomatoes.
For such a young kid, Rayden is turning into a regular bookworm as he loves his collection of colourful boardbooks. Often, he would stand next to his cupboard and point at the row of 'boohk boohk' to choose a book to 'read'.
His current favourite is a pop-up book featuring a tiger so naturally, the book is now called 'tai tai guh'.The list actually goes on but I better don't continue or else anybody who chance on this blog might throw up from all this mushy gushings over a baby!
Friday
Qs and As
I have been getting odd personal questions from out-of-touch friends, acquaintances, ex-colleagues, ex-schoolmates, ex-classmates and ex-whatever so I am posting some of the answers to any future questions I foresee (let me look into my crystal ball first...).
To those who have not kept in touch in the past ten years or so:
1) yes, I am married - a guy, my sweet photographer hubby, actually wanted to spend the rest of his life with tomboyish, serious, plain old me.
2) yes, I have a baby - hard to believe as it may seem considering I wasn't in the least motherly last time, I actually did went ahead to go through the many challenges of looking like a beached whale for ten months, undergo painful labour to have a bouncing cute baby boy. Frankly, he's worth all the pain I went through and all the lost in sleep and peace thereafter.
3) yes, I am now a journalist - hardly surprising to most of you who knew me in school since I always loved scribbling short stories when I am supposed to be doing homework / paying attention in class....
4) yes, I am still in good old Penang, work here, bought an apartment here, married here, have a baby here and will probably grow old and die here.
To those who knew me at work:
5) yes, I am now working for the company named after the sphere of scorching, hot gas in the sky called 'tai yang pao' in mandarin.
6) yes, I still go out on assignments and though you don't see me around much, it doesn't mean I am desk bound!
7) yes, I still have trouble matching names to faces except for those I knew for years...
To those who have not seen me for a few years:
8) yes, I am fatter than when I got married in 2003 but I can assure you I am probably fitter than most of you cause I can climb the stairs to the 15th floor at my apartment without getting out of breath. Besides, gimme a break, I had a baby for God's sake and it's not easy to lose all that pregnancy weight!
9) yes, I am now dieting and trying to lose all that pregnancy weight but please bear in mind, I am not a supermodel, my income and job does not depend on how skinny or fat I am AND importantly, my hubby doesn't mind. So please get over it and stop telling me how fat I look!
10) no, I am not having a second baby YET! Again, gimme a break, my son is barely two and you want me to think about having a second child???? When the time comes, I am sure you will be able to see, after all it is impossible to hide a pregnancy!
11) yes, I have a tattoo on my left leg and yes it is so permanent that it will probably be there still if I was murdered and chopped into pieces and my leg is the only part left of me.
12) no, the tattoo is not a flower or a plant or an animal. It is just some creative one-of-its-kind design by tattoo artist, Ono. He did the design freehand, without sketching it down or anything, so I am probably the only one with this design. And no, it is not faded, those faded parts are actually creative shadings made by the talented Ono.
13) no, the tattoo is not new. I have had it since 2003 or 2004....don't quite remember the exact year.
14) no, I won't tell you how much it cost to have the tattoo done but if you really want one, call me and I will give you Ono's number although I am not sure whether he is still doing tattoos for new clients. (he is very selective)
15) yes, I am still as sarcastic as ever and sometimes can be quite bitchy with a temper to match but all in all, I really meant no harm and no, I do not bite.
As for any questions that went unanswered, too bad! My crystal ball must be outdated and could not predict the questions. Send me an email and if I feel like answering it, I will.
To those who have not kept in touch in the past ten years or so:
1) yes, I am married - a guy, my sweet photographer hubby, actually wanted to spend the rest of his life with tomboyish, serious, plain old me.
2) yes, I have a baby - hard to believe as it may seem considering I wasn't in the least motherly last time, I actually did went ahead to go through the many challenges of looking like a beached whale for ten months, undergo painful labour to have a bouncing cute baby boy. Frankly, he's worth all the pain I went through and all the lost in sleep and peace thereafter.
3) yes, I am now a journalist - hardly surprising to most of you who knew me in school since I always loved scribbling short stories when I am supposed to be doing homework / paying attention in class....
4) yes, I am still in good old Penang, work here, bought an apartment here, married here, have a baby here and will probably grow old and die here.
To those who knew me at work:
5) yes, I am now working for the company named after the sphere of scorching, hot gas in the sky called 'tai yang pao' in mandarin.
6) yes, I still go out on assignments and though you don't see me around much, it doesn't mean I am desk bound!
7) yes, I still have trouble matching names to faces except for those I knew for years...
To those who have not seen me for a few years:
8) yes, I am fatter than when I got married in 2003 but I can assure you I am probably fitter than most of you cause I can climb the stairs to the 15th floor at my apartment without getting out of breath. Besides, gimme a break, I had a baby for God's sake and it's not easy to lose all that pregnancy weight!
9) yes, I am now dieting and trying to lose all that pregnancy weight but please bear in mind, I am not a supermodel, my income and job does not depend on how skinny or fat I am AND importantly, my hubby doesn't mind. So please get over it and stop telling me how fat I look!
10) no, I am not having a second baby YET! Again, gimme a break, my son is barely two and you want me to think about having a second child???? When the time comes, I am sure you will be able to see, after all it is impossible to hide a pregnancy!
11) yes, I have a tattoo on my left leg and yes it is so permanent that it will probably be there still if I was murdered and chopped into pieces and my leg is the only part left of me.
12) no, the tattoo is not a flower or a plant or an animal. It is just some creative one-of-its-kind design by tattoo artist, Ono. He did the design freehand, without sketching it down or anything, so I am probably the only one with this design. And no, it is not faded, those faded parts are actually creative shadings made by the talented Ono.
13) no, the tattoo is not new. I have had it since 2003 or 2004....don't quite remember the exact year.
14) no, I won't tell you how much it cost to have the tattoo done but if you really want one, call me and I will give you Ono's number although I am not sure whether he is still doing tattoos for new clients. (he is very selective)
15) yes, I am still as sarcastic as ever and sometimes can be quite bitchy with a temper to match but all in all, I really meant no harm and no, I do not bite.
As for any questions that went unanswered, too bad! My crystal ball must be outdated and could not predict the questions. Send me an email and if I feel like answering it, I will.
Thursday
Male chauvinism and sexist remarks
At the risk of sounding like an over-zealous feminist, I could not find it in myself to keep quiet about this issue at hand currently.
In this age and time and despite widespread awareness campaigns and whatnots from the NGOs and even the government, I do not understand why there are elected representatives out there who are total chauvinists and actually thought their sexist remarks are not sexist at all.
I almost punch the chauvinist idiot right in the face when he insisted he was not being sexist when he voiced his so-called personal opinion that there are sexual violence cases against children and women because of the way women dressed.
His exact words:
"Kalau tak percaya, you pergi tengok kat 'ABC place' (the name of the place have been changed to protect it) waktu malam, banyak wanita yang berpakaian tak senonoh. Seluarnya begitu low that kalau dia tunduk, boleh nampak semua. Saya lelaki, saya faham kalau lelaki nampak, tentu ada rasa ingin." (If you don't believe me, you go to 'ABC place' at night, you will find many indecently dressed women. Some of them are wearing such low cut pants that if they bend down, we can see everything. I am a man, I understand how other men will feel if they saw these)
He went on to say that it is this type of 'environment' that gave rise to men giving in to their lust. (thus causing sexual harassment/violence cases)
Of all the archaic, stupid, brainless and totally chauvinistic sexist thing to say! If he is some uneducated buffoon of a poor excuse for a man on the street, I may just pass it off for mere ignorance (though it is still inexcusable) but an elected representative????
The people actually voted for this idiot?
If that is not bad enough, he actually insisted that it was not a sexist remark at all. Yeah, sure, blaming the women for their dressing is not sexist in any way...what century is he from?
However, kudos goes to the several other male elected representatives (and also female, of course) who tried to put him in his place. The best comebacks are of course these very impartial and fair statements:
"Evidence clearly showed that the issue of dressing is not related to rape and molest which also happens to children and the elderly. The basis for sexual violence is because of unequel power relations between genders. Many chauvinistic men also brought about unfair and unequel actions and practises."
Another one:
"Women should not be blamed at all. It is the men who should control themselves. If their minds are pure, things like this would not happen at all."
And finally,
"These sexual predators are sick in the head and mentally unstable. They are the ones who should be punished and blamed, not the victims."
Need I say more?
In this age and time and despite widespread awareness campaigns and whatnots from the NGOs and even the government, I do not understand why there are elected representatives out there who are total chauvinists and actually thought their sexist remarks are not sexist at all.
I almost punch the chauvinist idiot right in the face when he insisted he was not being sexist when he voiced his so-called personal opinion that there are sexual violence cases against children and women because of the way women dressed.
His exact words:
"Kalau tak percaya, you pergi tengok kat 'ABC place' (the name of the place have been changed to protect it) waktu malam, banyak wanita yang berpakaian tak senonoh. Seluarnya begitu low that kalau dia tunduk, boleh nampak semua. Saya lelaki, saya faham kalau lelaki nampak, tentu ada rasa ingin." (If you don't believe me, you go to 'ABC place' at night, you will find many indecently dressed women. Some of them are wearing such low cut pants that if they bend down, we can see everything. I am a man, I understand how other men will feel if they saw these)
He went on to say that it is this type of 'environment' that gave rise to men giving in to their lust. (thus causing sexual harassment/violence cases)
Of all the archaic, stupid, brainless and totally chauvinistic sexist thing to say! If he is some uneducated buffoon of a poor excuse for a man on the street, I may just pass it off for mere ignorance (though it is still inexcusable) but an elected representative????
The people actually voted for this idiot?
If that is not bad enough, he actually insisted that it was not a sexist remark at all. Yeah, sure, blaming the women for their dressing is not sexist in any way...what century is he from?
However, kudos goes to the several other male elected representatives (and also female, of course) who tried to put him in his place. The best comebacks are of course these very impartial and fair statements:
"Evidence clearly showed that the issue of dressing is not related to rape and molest which also happens to children and the elderly. The basis for sexual violence is because of unequel power relations between genders. Many chauvinistic men also brought about unfair and unequel actions and practises."
Another one:
"Women should not be blamed at all. It is the men who should control themselves. If their minds are pure, things like this would not happen at all."
And finally,
"These sexual predators are sick in the head and mentally unstable. They are the ones who should be punished and blamed, not the victims."
Need I say more?
Sunday
Of breast milk and stupidstitions..
"Don't give him chicken, it will worsen his cough and create more phlegm."
For the umpteenth time, my 'oh-so-wise' babysitter finds it her duty to impart her 'wise' advises to me pertaining to the health and food intake of my toddler.
Barely able to contain my annoyance, I almost embarked on another endless argument on this pointless, baseless and not-scientifically proven bit of 'advise' with her. Fortunately, (for my blood pressure) sensing this, my husband intervened and immediately whisked us away all before I could gather my breath.
Don't get me wrong, I don't have much complaints about my babysitter as she is quite reliable, does not count the minutes that we were late in picking up my son, she keeps her house extremely clean (I swear, her place is probably cleaner than our apartment) and took good care of my son. Importantly, my son is used to her and gets along with the other kids she is taking care of.
Granted that she is not highly educated, I can't blame her for being loaded with gadzillions of old wives' tales that boggles the mind. However, when it comes to my kid, it sorta grated, especially when it is really senseless advise pertaining to certain foods and even my breastmilk.
I breast feed my child exclusively since he was born and we never gave him even a sip of formula until he turns one. To be able to do that when I go back to work, I expressed and kept by milk in the freezer as advised by paediatricians and lactation consultants.
Of course, my babysitter initially had a lot of complaints over this. The first few was the trouble having to heat up the milk by soaking it in hot water. To solve that, I bought a bottle warmer and it never came up again.
However, other 'good-meaning' advises surfaced.
"Giving him frozen milk is not good for him. It will give him a lot of stomach wind" was one of them. Hellllooo...the idea is to heat up the milk and give remember? But no, even if the milk is hot after it was reheated, it does not count. Anything from the freezer causes wind, regardless of whether it has been heated up or not.
Another advise, 'Breast milk is not good. Formula is much better for him. All the babies I took care of are stronger and healthier and have firmer flesh because they take formula. Your son is so weak and soft because of breast milk.'
Now, this comment really made me furious. I argued with her for months on this issue and we are still at a standstill up to now. She still stand firm to her argument eventhough for the first six months of his life, my son never caught cold, never got sick and was healthier than any of the other kids because he depended solely on my breast milk.
I blame this reasoning of hers on all the formula advertisements on television proclaiming its many benefits of added DHA, SHA and whatever-A to enhance IQ, EQ and whatever-Q they can think of. People like her who do not read about proper nutrition for babies from reliable sources, often gets hoodwinked by those advertisements. Who wouldn't believe a cherubic faced kid winning an adult at a game of chess in record time because he took so-and-so milk powder?
Whatever happened to breast milk is best for baby? That message seemed to be confined to the bottom of baby food packaging and in small print on milk powder packaging.
Anyway, back to my babysitter. My son became sick for the first time at 10 months old, which is normal since he is surrounded by three other kids of varying ages who often 'share' their germs and viruses.
My babysitter immediately pounce on this and said 'this is because you give him breast milk from the freezer. that's why he is coughing with so much phlegm.'
Tired of arguing with her, I ignored this comment. Then came her 'well-meaning' food advise.
"don't give him vegetables and fruits, it's very cooling and will make him cough more. Also no chicken or eggs, those also cause coughing and phlegm"
To top it all off, she again extol the many benefits of formula feeding and keep telling me to stop breast feeding.
If not for my strong conviction to continue to breastfeed my baby till he is at least two, I would probably have given in to her insistence as she often likes to add in 'trust me, I have so many years of experience in childcare. I know what is good for baby.All children under my care grew up to be big and strong.'
Yeah, and again, why must all those formulas compare themselves to breastmilk if they are better than breastmilk? Why use breastmilk as the benchmark? why use the phrase 'Almost as good as breastmilk' if breastmilk is so inferior.
As for the load of dos and don'ts, whoever heard of no vegie and no fruit diet for children? What's the food pyramid for, then? Decoration?
Unsurprisingly, my babysitter is not the only one with such believes as I know tonnes of other similarly stupidstitious people (the real spelling is superstitious but since it is so stupid, I have decided to call these believes stupidstitious).
So, if old wives' tale is to be believed, stored EBM (expressed breast milk) is bad, vegies are bad, fruits are bad, commercial formulas with all the extra As and Qs are good, lots of red meat is good, chicken and eggs are bad, and overweight, obese babies are good.
Go chew on that!
For the umpteenth time, my 'oh-so-wise' babysitter finds it her duty to impart her 'wise' advises to me pertaining to the health and food intake of my toddler.
Barely able to contain my annoyance, I almost embarked on another endless argument on this pointless, baseless and not-scientifically proven bit of 'advise' with her. Fortunately, (for my blood pressure) sensing this, my husband intervened and immediately whisked us away all before I could gather my breath.
Don't get me wrong, I don't have much complaints about my babysitter as she is quite reliable, does not count the minutes that we were late in picking up my son, she keeps her house extremely clean (I swear, her place is probably cleaner than our apartment) and took good care of my son. Importantly, my son is used to her and gets along with the other kids she is taking care of.
Granted that she is not highly educated, I can't blame her for being loaded with gadzillions of old wives' tales that boggles the mind. However, when it comes to my kid, it sorta grated, especially when it is really senseless advise pertaining to certain foods and even my breastmilk.
I breast feed my child exclusively since he was born and we never gave him even a sip of formula until he turns one. To be able to do that when I go back to work, I expressed and kept by milk in the freezer as advised by paediatricians and lactation consultants.
Of course, my babysitter initially had a lot of complaints over this. The first few was the trouble having to heat up the milk by soaking it in hot water. To solve that, I bought a bottle warmer and it never came up again.
However, other 'good-meaning' advises surfaced.
"Giving him frozen milk is not good for him. It will give him a lot of stomach wind" was one of them. Hellllooo...the idea is to heat up the milk and give remember? But no, even if the milk is hot after it was reheated, it does not count. Anything from the freezer causes wind, regardless of whether it has been heated up or not.
Another advise, 'Breast milk is not good. Formula is much better for him. All the babies I took care of are stronger and healthier and have firmer flesh because they take formula. Your son is so weak and soft because of breast milk.'
Now, this comment really made me furious. I argued with her for months on this issue and we are still at a standstill up to now. She still stand firm to her argument eventhough for the first six months of his life, my son never caught cold, never got sick and was healthier than any of the other kids because he depended solely on my breast milk.
I blame this reasoning of hers on all the formula advertisements on television proclaiming its many benefits of added DHA, SHA and whatever-A to enhance IQ, EQ and whatever-Q they can think of. People like her who do not read about proper nutrition for babies from reliable sources, often gets hoodwinked by those advertisements. Who wouldn't believe a cherubic faced kid winning an adult at a game of chess in record time because he took so-and-so milk powder?
Whatever happened to breast milk is best for baby? That message seemed to be confined to the bottom of baby food packaging and in small print on milk powder packaging.
Anyway, back to my babysitter. My son became sick for the first time at 10 months old, which is normal since he is surrounded by three other kids of varying ages who often 'share' their germs and viruses.
My babysitter immediately pounce on this and said 'this is because you give him breast milk from the freezer. that's why he is coughing with so much phlegm.'
Tired of arguing with her, I ignored this comment. Then came her 'well-meaning' food advise.
"don't give him vegetables and fruits, it's very cooling and will make him cough more. Also no chicken or eggs, those also cause coughing and phlegm"
To top it all off, she again extol the many benefits of formula feeding and keep telling me to stop breast feeding.
If not for my strong conviction to continue to breastfeed my baby till he is at least two, I would probably have given in to her insistence as she often likes to add in 'trust me, I have so many years of experience in childcare. I know what is good for baby.All children under my care grew up to be big and strong.'
Yeah, and again, why must all those formulas compare themselves to breastmilk if they are better than breastmilk? Why use breastmilk as the benchmark? why use the phrase 'Almost as good as breastmilk' if breastmilk is so inferior.
As for the load of dos and don'ts, whoever heard of no vegie and no fruit diet for children? What's the food pyramid for, then? Decoration?
Unsurprisingly, my babysitter is not the only one with such believes as I know tonnes of other similarly stupidstitious people (the real spelling is superstitious but since it is so stupid, I have decided to call these believes stupidstitious).
So, if old wives' tale is to be believed, stored EBM (expressed breast milk) is bad, vegies are bad, fruits are bad, commercial formulas with all the extra As and Qs are good, lots of red meat is good, chicken and eggs are bad, and overweight, obese babies are good.
Go chew on that!
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